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Every time I think I have my ducks all in a row …

Every time I think I have my ducks all in a row, the damn ducks waddle off in all directions ecard

I can’t tell if I’m dealing well with life these days …

I can't tell if I'm dealing well with life these days or I just don't give a shit anymore ecard

That awkward moment when you come home …

That awkward moment when you come home, look in the mirror and think 'Did I look like this all day?' ecard

Arguing with a woman is like getting arrested …

Arguing with a woman is like getting arrested. Everything you say can and be used against you ecard

It’s time to give my pillow …

It's time to give my pillow some head and my mattress some ass ... Now that's a threesome ecard

Twinkle twinkle little snitch …

Twinkle twinkle little snitch, mind your own business you nosey bitch ecard

Sometimes I get road rage …

Sometimes I get road rage from standing in line ecard

Someday we’ll look back on this …

Someday we'll look back on this, laugh awkwardly and change the subject ecard

Can I skip working …

Can I skip working and just go straight to the part where I'm a princess ecard

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