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I wish my perfectly detailed wedding plans …

I wish my perfectly detailed wedding plans came with a fiance ecard

Who says I can’t cook?

Who says I can't cook? You obviously haven't tasted my cereal ecard

We’ve been through a lot together …

We've been through a lot together and most of it was your fault ecard

I try to have positive thoughts …

I try to have positive thoughts and the only thing I'm positive of is that people suck ecard

I wake up everyday planning to be productive …

I wake up everyday planning to be productive and then a voice in my head says 'Haha good one!' and we laugh and take a nap ecard

Time is precious …

Time is precious. Waste it away.

Sweetie, I’m gonna need you to …

Sweetie, I'm gonna need you to put those few remaining brain cells together and work with me here, okay? ecard

That disappointing moment …

That disappointing moment when you pull up to work and it isn't fully engulfed in flames ecard

Single women aren’t really that hard to figure out …

Single women aren't really that hard to figure out. Either we like you enough to shave or we don't ecard

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