ecard

If you want to see bright-eyed and bushy-tailed …

If you want to see bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in the morning, go find a squirrel ecard

Let me check my giveashitometer …

Let me check my giveashitometer. Nope, nothing ecard

If you’re talking to a guy …

If you're talking to a guy and he's only staring at your boobs, just look at his package and squint a little ecard

If you aren’t somewhat crazy in the head …

If you aren't somewhat crazy in the head, I'm afraid we can't be friends ecard

I was hoping for a battle of wits …

I was hoping for a battle of wits but you appear to be unarmed ecard

It’s hard to find a friend …

It's hard to find a friend who's cute, loving, generous, sexy, caring and smart. My advice to you all is don't lose me ecard

I get more cleaning done …

I get more cleaning done in the 10 minutes before someone comes over than I do in a week ecard

The first thing I do when I get home …

The first thing I do when I get home is make myself look as publicly unacceptable as possible ecard

I don’t mind going to work …

I don't mind going to work. It's the 8 hour wait to go home that I think is bullshit ecard

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