ecard

I could use …

I could use a foot massage, three donuts and an orgasm ecard

I drink wine because …

I drink wine because I don't like to keep things bottled up ecard

Hang on …

Hang on. Let me overthink this ecard

That awkward moment when …

That awkward moment when you're singing a song you sang often as a child, and you suddenly understand the lyrics ecard

Hi …

Hi. I don't care. Thanks ecard

Note to Husband

Note to husband: Your dinner is in the recipe book on page 34. And the ingredients are at the grocery store ecard

If you are arguing with a woman …

If you are arguing with a woman and she says 'Wow', you are done. Abort the argument immediately ecard

Well, I’ve finally reached the wonder years …

Well, I've finally reached the wonder years ... Wonder where my car is parked? Wonder where I left my phone? Wonder what day it is? ecard

I prefer to be crazy and happy …

I prefer to be crazy and happy rather than normal and bitter ecard

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